Everyone from time to time has had life experiences that have been confusing, painful or challenging. Life is difficult. You are the one person who can make the changes necessary in your relationships that would lead to healthy and a meaningful place in life.
In spite of your challenges today, and your past painful life experiences, it is up to you to take the right steps. Finding the therapist who is the right fit is half of the work. You may find it helpful to read my blog discussing how to search for a good therapist. You may click right here to read about finding a marriage therapist.
Perhaps, you are married and your spouse is unwilling to meet with a therapist for marriage counseling, but you as an individual need help and support. Please don't let that stop nor discourage you. The good news is that, if your spouse is unwilling to do therapy, you can still seek theapy for yourself. One change can be significant in the relationship. Do consider individual therapy, and you can tell your spouse that you are going to follow through with your individual counseling and he/she can inform you later if they have a change of mind.
As humans, we are not designed to live life nor process our stories alone in isolation, but we are supposed to be with someone whom we can connect with.
Therapy For Women:
Women often struggle with self-criticism, self-doubt and feeling not good enough. While this is very sad and women suffer in these ways, they have not taken the time to reflect on the root of these thought which leads to these misleading negative feelings. Our early life experiences create a blue print that has a lifetime impact. The good news is that you can change it as an adult. I often hear from many women statements such as: "I don't feel like I matter" "I don't have a voice in the relationship and don't know what to do" or women say "What's wrong with me?" "I don't feel seen in my relationship" "I don't know how to deal with my husband's addiction?" They see themselves as the problem. Similar thoughts and feelings that have been going on for a long time, they tend to lead to depression, anxiety, overall feeling unhappy and feeling stuck. Do you identify with any of these?
- Are you still dealing with some unresolved pain or issue from the past or your family of origin?
- Are you ready to turn your relationship in the right direction, but don't know how?
- Do you feel anxious and you feel stuck because it's impacting your relationship and your overall well being?
- Is sometimes your past interfering with your present relationships?
- Do you have difficulty saying no?
- Are you tired of that addiction or addictive behavior in your life?
- Did you get into the relationship quickly and you keep having arguments and don't know how to move forward?
- Do you know how to have this difficult conversation that is not detrimental to your relationship?
As a psychotherapist Jousline Savra practices based on the attachment theory as she helps adult individuals and couples with very difficult emotional and communication issue. Ms. Savra counseling practice in Toluca Lake is highly respected and in a great demand by couples and adult men and women.
Attachment Theory and You. Every person has an attachment style which is also their love style. Your love style is formed as a result of your early life experiences. During your work of counseling with Jousline, you will learn how your love style causes you problems in your relationship and your communication. You can read more about love styles in Jousline Savra’s Blog section in this website.
Meanwhile, please feel free to contact Ms. Savra to set up an appointment to do more in-depth work on your attachment or your love style and gain clarity on how your attachment style sabotages your relationships. You can click on this section contact where she will respond to you as soon as possible. You can also visit How We Love website and take their love style quiz, right here to learn about your love style. Learning your love style and your own attachment style will significantly help and improve your life, your marital relationship and overal your interpersonal interactions for better.
Your Toluca Lake Therapist is highly experienced and trained to help you as a therapist to not only increase appropriate self-awareness of your needs but she will help you by providing to seek the right tools for the types of healthy changes you want to make in your life and your relationships. Ms. Savra helps men and women addressing difficult issues in their relationships during the process of their individual therapy. Sometimes it’s the first time they can uncover and heal from any unresolved issues that may be standing in the way of creating positive and healthy changes in their lives or relationships.
Many women as wives and partners are suffering in a silent pain of shame, confusion and sadness when their husbands or partners struggle with any sexual integrity issues such as viewing pornography or engaging in extra-marital affairs, and perhaps more. Women feel so much shame about their husband's sex addition and compulsive sexual habits outside of the marriage while they suffer alone. Don't be alone with this pain. Many times women believe that the sign of strength is being able to handle marital problem alone, and as a result they have become emotionally self-sufficient. Unfortunately this is an epidemic and many marriages are suffering due to sexual integrity issues. Somehow men viewing pornography has been normalized by many in our society as men being men. No one really talks about the pain and the reality of this in marriage. Furthermore, the existence and the role of the social media and internet have also made this issue more complicated.
One of the most important tasks women have is to learn to value themselves. Learning and taking the time to look at your uncomfortable feelings and experiences and understand your pain, is the key to your overall wellness. Women can’t do this alone, actually you are not meant to go through this alone! You must find the right therapist who knows how to help you with this, who can help you to grow and heal as you feel confused and betrayed in your marriage.
Therapy For Men:
Only if men could talk! Our culture teaches men to isolate when they are in pain. In particular, in today’s culture with the power of social media and confusing messages, men are more confused than ever. Men numb their distress and negative feelings with different types of activities, distractions and addictive behaviors. These are not the real solution for them and they lead to being misunderstood in their marriages and lives. Men too have needs but rarely anyone helped them to know how to address their needs in healthy ways. So many men suffer quietly in shame. As a therapist I see it in my counseling sessions frequently. The good news is that there is much hope and there is a way to come out of shame and heal and grow and live to their full potentials.
Growing up, many boys are given certain messages such as it's not OK to show feelings when they were growing up. Moreover they long to hear that their fathers are proud of them and feel important and visible to their dads. When a boy becomes an adult man, and enters into intimate relationship, his significant other expects him to be a sensitive communicator, and express his feelings, and he has yet to have figured out for himself what that means. These experiences may lead men feeling at a loss to meet expectations as they communicate, it may lead to feelings of inadequacy, frustration and anger. The process of individual therapy can help men with the opportunity to get a clarity for themselves in identifying their true emotions, look at their value system, reflect on who they are as men and learn how to effectively communicate in his relationships and connect with his wife. The journey of individual therapy can also create feelings of self-empowerment that will enable a man richer relationship with himself and his loved ones.
Ms. Savra's counseling office is located in the heart of Toluca Lake in Burbank close to Studio City blocks away from NBC Universal City, The Disney Chanel and Warner Bros Studios. An advance appointment is required - you can request for an appointment by clicking on top of this page. In your email, please include specific dates and times that you are able to meet for an appointment. Please do not include any sensitive clinical or relationship issues in this email.