Ah, the wedding day. It’s a magical time when two people come together to declare their love for each other in front of everyone they know.
With flowers, dresses, suits, and music, it’s a day full of joy and celebration. But what happens after the confetti settles and the guests go home? Marriage.
It is a whole different ballgame. It’s a commitment to be there for each other through thick and thin, to support each other in good times and bad. It’s about building a life together and navigating the challenges that come with it.
What makes a healthy marriage?
Well, a healthy marriage is where partners are happy, satisfied, and fulfilled. It’s a relationship where both partners feel heard, respected, and supported.
And guess what? You can only build this type of marriage on a great foundation of trust, open communication, and mutual understanding.
Partners should be able to communicate their needs, desires, and concerns in a safe and supportive environment. They should be willing to work together to find solutions to problems, and to compromise when necessary. In a healthy marriage, couples respect each other’s opinions, feelings, and boundaries.
So, what leads to it?
Strong communication
Communication is key in any relationship, and a healthy marriage is no exception. Good communication involves both listening and expressing oneself clearly.
When partners feel heard and understood, it helps build a deeper level of trust and intimacy. In a healthy marriage, partners should be able to communicate their needs, desires, and concerns in a safe and supportive environment.
Mutual respect
A healthy marriage is built on a foundation of mutual respect. This means valuing your partner’s opinions, feelings, and boundaries and treating them as equals.
When partners show each other respect, it builds a sense of trust and understanding. A lack of respect can lead to feelings of resentment, anger, and frustration.
Willingness to compromise
Compromise is another vital factor in a healthy marriage. Inevitably, there will be times when partners have different opinions or preferences.
A willingness to meet in the middle and find solutions that work for both partners can help prevent conflicts and build a stronger relationship.
What is premarital counseling?
It is a type of therapy that helps couples prepare for marriage by addressing potential issues before they become serious problems.
Premarital counseling involves meeting with a therapist to discuss topics like communication, conflict resolution, finances, intimacy, and parenting, to develop the skills needed to build a strong and healthy marriage.
It is a proactive approach to building a strong foundation for a successful and satisfying marriage.
Let’s illustrate this to help you understand better.
Jack and Emily
Meet Jack and Emily. They are in their late 20s and have been together for three years. They recently got engaged and are excited about their upcoming wedding.
However, they also know that marriage can be challenging and want to ensure they are fully prepared for what lies ahead. That’s why Jack and Emily decided to seek premarital counseling with a licensed therapist.
During their first session, the therapist asked the couple questions to better understand their relationship, such as how they met, their goals for the future, and what they liked and disliked about each other.
Over the course of several premarital sessions, the therapist guided them through various topics such as communication, conflict resolution, and intimacy.
By the end, Jack and Emily felt more confident in their relationship and ready to take on the challenges and joys of marriage together.
Through premarital counseling, they gained a deeper understanding of each other and developed the skills they needed to build a healthy union. They feel excited and prepared for their wedding day and look forward to a long and happy life together.
The 5 types of premarital counseling
There are different types of premarital counseling. Couples should choose the type that best fits their needs and preferences, knowing that each has advantages and disadvantages.
- Religious based
The counseling sessions may include discussions about the religious teachings on marriage, spiritual practices, and expectations for the relationship. The counselor may also incorporate prayer or other religious rituals into the sessions.
One potential drawback is that it may not include couples who do not share the same faith or beliefs. Additionally, some religious leaders may have limited training in counseling and may not be equipped to address complex issues that can arise in relationships.
- One-on-one with a marriage counselor
This type of counseling is often seen as a more personalized approach, as the couple works directly with a licensed therapist specializing in premarital counseling.
The counselor may use various techniques such as discussion, role-playing, and homework assignments to help the couple explore topics such as communication, conflict resolution, and intimacy.
- Questionnaires
It is based on assessments that can help the couple identify areas of compatibility and potential areas of conflict. The questions may cover topics such as finances, family values, and goals for the future.
The questionnaire results can then guide discussions and exercises to help the couple strengthen their relationship.
- Discussions and group courses
This often appeals to couples who enjoy interacting with others and may benefit from hearing different perspectives and experiences.
The sessions may involve discussions, exercises, and role-playing to help the couples build communication and conflict-resolution skills.
- Online courses
This counseling type often appeals to couples who prefer a more flexible and convenient approach.
The courses may include video lessons, quizzes, and exercises covering various topics related to building a strong and healthy marriage.
Though, it may not provide the same level of interaction and personalized guidance as other types of counseling.
Is premarital counseling the key to a healthy marriage?
Well, it can be a helpful tool for couples to prepare for marriage and build a strong foundation for their relationship.
However, it’s essential to note that there is no guarantee that premarital counseling alone will lead to a healthy and successful marriage.
A healthy marriage involves ongoing communication, mutual respect, trust, and a willingness to work through challenges together.
While premarital counseling can provide valuable insights and skills, it’s ultimately up to the couple to put those lessons into practice and continue to prioritize their relationship over time.
Who should attend premarital counseling?
Premarital counseling can be beneficial for any couple who is considering marriage or is engaged. It’s a proactive step towards building a healthy and successful marriage and can help couples identify and address issues before they become major problems.
Some couples may choose to attend premarital counseling if they are experiencing challenges in their relationship and want to work through them before getting married.
Others may attend simply as a way to strengthen their communication skills, establish healthy boundaries, or learn more about each other’s values and beliefs.
Ultimately, anyone wanting to invest in their relationship and build a strong foundation for their future can benefit from premarital counseling.
Conclusion
Premarital counseling is a process designed to help couples prepare for marriage by addressing potential issues, building communication skills, and establishing a strong foundation for a healthy and successful marriage.
Jousline Savra is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and has extensive experience with couples before marriage. She focuses on preventative care, preparing couples with the right relationship skills before they tie the knot. Premarital counseling can thoroughly help build your relationship and make you emotionally available for marriage.
By investing in their relationship through premarital counseling, couples can help increase their chances of building a fulfilling and satisfying marriage that stands the test of time. Call Jousline today and prepare for your life together.